Bubbly Peanut

Three phrases our daughter has been using on a constant basis:

1. "I'm so happy" (with big smile)
2. "I'm so excited (also with big smile)
3. "I wuv wu" and/or "Give me a kiss"

Fortunately, I think, she is sweet more than she is sour but her passion goes both ways and the sour can be unnerving. This week, thankfully, hubby is home and we are a disciplinary duo.

Christmas music for your listening pleasure

Here are a few of my favorites. If you haven't heard Harry's "I Pray On Christmas", it's great. Someday I will see this man in concert!!!

The Monkey House

Gymnast Abby

Today was Abby's last day at the Little Gym, so I got a wee bit of video and a bunch of pictures. 

Thanks

Just wanted to say a big thanks to all those who have been praying for us. I know that's why Chris's job was spared. We feel very loved and blessed to have so many that cared enough to pray.

HUGS

The Office

This opening scene with Dwight's desk gave me a good belly laugh last night. Many things about this show are classic not the least of which are Jim's pranks on Dwight.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHrmpLwH2zU

More fun...

Who better to do an elf dance with than Mom, Manda, and the kids! 

http://elfyourself.jibjab.com/view/ZGyaAczwKw8UwDmjZew5

Stress

I have not been blogging much lately, I guess I have been a little distracted (or stressed ;-)), or maybe not sure what to say. Stress is a funny thing. You try to deny it but it creeps in on you slowly until your body is acting wacky. I am so thankful for my husband though. In times of stress his brain is still in a constant state of comic flux and the jokes are even funnier. We know in the big picture we have our family and a lot to be thankful for. Last night though, we had some good laughs due to our MacBook's photo software. Check it out:

Our weekend getaway

About a month ago for my 30th birthday our family took a long weekend at a cabin just outside of Kansas City. We had an amazing time. Mostly we hung out at the cabin and walked the grounds but it was awesome and I would highly recommend this place. Here are some pics from our trip. http://www.stonehavenguesthouse.com/

Long weekend

I love long weekends. It gives us the opportunity to create our agenda as we go (this weekend anyway) and have some family fun. So here is what we have done in the last two days:

• Stayed up late watching Jon and Kate Plus 8 (probably should be renamed The Rich and Gorgeous Gosselins after the Hawaiian vacation and wedding renewal, I am so jealous!)
• Slept in and had blueberry pancakes for breakfast
• Watched Ratatouille (such a sweet movie, I love it more then my kids...."anyone can cook!"
• Had Thanksgiving leftovers for dinner (sometimes I like them cold just like my pizza, yum!)
• Played, played, played
• Worked out and loosened up the back, feel the burn! Love it!
• Since our old computer was laid to rest we ordered our new Macbook (should be here today! woohoo!)
• Made our Christmas list
• Did some online Black Friday shopping
• Did our Christmas card pic in PJs in front of the fire
• Ordered our Christmas cards
• Had a visit from Grandpa Sommer
• And for the grand finale tonight...............impromptu date night, yeah!!!!!

My marriage

I have a few friends who are in troubled marriages right now and it hurts my heart. It really makes me hold my husband closer and thank God for him. Not only that but it reminds me that marriages take work to continue those romantic feelings and cannot thrive without God's help.

Though I know mostly what I can do for my friends is pray I so want to help in anyway I can. There are great resources out there for any marriage and all marriages need to be watered and maintained.

So here are a few. First, The Love Dare which was used by the husband in the movie Fireproof. http://www.fireproofyourmarriage.com/couples.php This is for those who have lost those feelings and need a new perspective on their marriage.

Also, Living on the Edge Ministries (Chip Ingram) is great. If you join their online community you can listen and download free messages. I recommend.
House or Home? - Marriage: A Holy Covenant, Part 1 and 2 http://www.lote.org/lotecommunity/broadcasts/online_daily.php

I know I have not been married that long and that all marriages have their ups and downs but I know God is on our side and that we have the right view of it now to succeed. Marriage is a promise, a covenant with God and He can hold it together no matter the circumstances.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 (New International Version)
12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Our pastor used that verse when he delivered the message at our wedding and I will never forget it.

Wow, their my kids!

Yesterday was a little different then most Thursdays. Toby's was off school (CDO) so I took both kids to the Little Gym. After some initial upset at the beginning Toby literally dove right in. He was like a little Olympian diving, jumping, and somersaulting. His teacher asked if he had had classes before and I said nope, he just goofs around somersaulting with his sister at home.

I was just so proud of him. After crying for Papa at the beginning he did a 180 and showed such confidence, athleticism, grace, and a desire to have fun. It made me wonder what he was going to grow up to be but gave me a warm feeling it was going to be something that he and I would be proud of. I so love that boy.

Little Abster held her own too. Though usually she ignores me coaxing her to pay attention to the teacher, she did great! She listened and participated and had a lot of fun too. Although, she still wouldn't let the teacher help her "Let Mommy do it!", I didn't mind. She is a Momma's girl.

My warm feelings about them yesterday were good because today they really wore me out with whining, nagging, and temper tantrums. Not to mention our first poop potty accident in days, ugh!

Good Papa

Last night I had a manicure for a fun GNO treat and I brought some nail polish home with me to do Abigail. She just woke up from nap and wanted her nails done and since I was busy working on the computer Papa with no hesitation went to get the nail polish. Too cute!

Dad's

If you have never had Dad's Scotch Oatmeal cookies go right now to the store and buy some. They are around $3 a bag at most local groceries. They are an old St. Louis cookie company and they are yummy! One one of these days I am going to go over to Dad's in South City and get some fresh. They also make great Christmas gifts: http://www.dadscookies.com/

Fall and Winter are here!

Though the kids and I were able to get out and play and the leaves a lot earlie rin the week, it finally got a little colder today and I am loving it! It's been a busy month and I am ready to slow down, cuddle up, read, and drink lots of tea and hot chocolate.

I think my body is starting to rebel again anyway. I had a bad cold, that is better but lingering and creeped up into my eye to give me an infection! No big deal but I am wearing my glasses and wanting to sleep all the time......zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Little Job

We are Extreme Makeover: Home Edition fans and this one from last Sunday I can't get out of my head. It was awesome not only because of this little boys trials (6 years of leukemia, dbl lung transplant, chemo & radiation, his heart stopping and almost losing him, and now though he is healing he is confined to a wheelchair and swollen from meds)and will to live but also that they let his mom talk about the bible's Job and how she knew her son would be like him. He would have trials now but later he would be fully blessed. She also went on to talk about the greatest blessing from their trial was that she appreciated every little thing, just the kids laughing brought her joyful tears. By the way this song too, is really great. It's by Mark Schultz. They played it quite a bit when Ben Hornby was missing and I think back to praying so hard for that little boy.

24 Hour Day

I heard someone tell me recently God only gives you enough time in the day to do the things He wants you to do so if you don't get something done don't worry about it, it wasn't meant to be done today! I love that and think I am doing a pretty good job remembering it as it is crunch time for the BOH dinner auction.

We are still looking for attendees if anyone is interested. It is a fun night for a great cause: www.basketofhope.org

I went on a women's retreat this weekend and it was awesome! I had never been on one with church before but is a great time to soul search and reevaluate. So, what I discovered again and solidified in my mind is that my children and husband are my first ministry/priority and if anything I get involved in puts a strain on that relationship I need to take a step back. It's so important to be home with them and not running around all the time. It's good for me too.

Good Soup Recipe

I am a big fan of the Biggest Loser so when they had the show with Chef Rocco I went to the website and pulled some of the recipes to try. I tried this one last week and it was really good! I did substitue turkey sausage and added 1/2 a chopped green pepper. Also, I didn't have salt-free marinara but next time I will use it because my regular marinara is through the roof on sodium and the soup did taste pretty salty.

Tiny Turkey Meatball and Chickpea Soup with Broccoli Rabe and Pecorino

Serves 4 289 calories per serving
2 cups low-sodium chicken broth
2 cups low-fat salt-free marinara
One 15 ounce can low-sodium chickpeas, drained and rinsed
Crushed red pepper flakes to taste
1-1/3 pound package ground lean turkey
Nu-Salt
½ pound broccoli rabe, cut into bite size pieces
2 tablespoons grated pecorino romano

DIRECTIONS
1. Heat a large pot over high heat with chicken broth, marinara sauce, beans and crushed red pepper flakes until mixture comes to a simmer.
2. While mixture comes to a simmer, season ground turkey with Nu-Salt and pepper flakes. Roll turkey into about 40 meatballs.
3. Next, stir broccoli rabe into the broth and bring to a simmer. Add meatballs to the broth, cover pan with lid and lightly poach the meatballs until just cooked through, stirring occasionally for about 6 minutes. The broth should barely simmer. Check soup for seasoning.
4. Ladle into 4 large bowls and top with pecorino. Although no actual salt is called for in this recipe, please add it as you see fit.

Endoscopy

Yesterday I did something for the first time, I had an endoscopy. Basically, they put you to sleep and stick a camera down your esophagus. It is a weird feeling. The last thing I remember is the nurse telling me she was putting the medicine in my IV and she would then spray my throat with something and put something on my mouth. The next thing I know I hear voices and think I am falling to sleep when actually I am already in recovery, I never felt anything............weird!

Turns out I have a little damage to my esophagus and I need to be careful of some foods and not get myself worried sick about things (hahaha).

I do feel though it is an answer to a recurrent prayer. After all that worrying about "what if" dadadada.........I know God wants me right where I am and wants me to stop worrying and trust Him. I am thankful of the changes God is making in me and it helps me to be a better mom and wife (my recurrent prayer).

Free Saturday

Today was one of those Saturdays our family had nothing planned. These only come along maybe once a month and they are nice when they do. Not that we don't enjoy the many weekend activities with family, friends, and church but sometimes we need a day just the four of us where we come up with the agenda as we go. So for today's agenda we....

• slept in until after 7:30
• made french toast
• played
• put Abby's new used furniture in her room and re-arranged it (very cute!)
• naps for kids, showers for adults then watched Biggest Loser on tape
• dinner at Bread Co (and may I recommed the Orchard Harvest salad, yum!)
• drove a little bit and browsed at Papa's dream Jeep
• went to Target and got some necesseties but also browsed for fun stuff
• get kids in bed
• watch movie with popcorn (Papa got Mama Juno for an anniversary present)

It was a nice day :-)

It feels good

Some people can relate and some will hate this statement but I LOVE working out. Especially when I really try my hardest and push it to the max. It feels good. I feel stronger, healthier, and more energetic. I listen to music and I pray during this time too. It nurtures me a bit. I think I definitely get that high that people talk about (endorphins???). I truly think it makes me a better me.

Sometimes though it is nice to see it pay off. Case in point: I know I am boasting here but yesterday I was helping haul some beer at a golf tournament. I was able to haul two cases of beer at a time up a flight of stairs and across the floor three times in a row no problem. Another woman called me "her hero" as she was struggling lifting one at a time. I know, "toot-toot" but I thank God for the endurance and consistency he has given me that I am starting to notice a difference. I pray that I use this strength and energy to do God's work and not for my own agenda.

Fireproof

Chris and I saw Fireproof last night at the Des Peres theater and it was one of the best movies I have ever seen! REALLY! Kirk Cameron did an awesome job too, I didn’t realize what a great actor he was. The movie had humor, drama, action, suspense, a few surprise twists, and you will need your tissue, it is a tearjerker.

It is a must see, must own movie. I may even go to the theater and see it again.

http://www.fireproofyourmarriage.com/

Ebelyn

For Abby's birthday she got a baby Cabbage Patch named "Evelyn". So now everytime she goes to bed she requests that we cover "Ebelyn" up as well as her.

Health Insurance

I had been disappointed in our health care and insurance system from stories I had heard in the past but now I am feeling a little worried. We know someone who's Turner Syndrome daughter was recently turned down for health insurance claiming Turner's is a preexisting condition. This is scary especially since Turner's girls need to see several specialists (cardiologist, endocrinologist, urologist to name a few) and have many tests regularly.

There is a documentary (I love documentaries) on channel 9 tonight about the uninsured in America and then following I think a short program on the new candidates proposals to the health care problems. I am taping it!!!!

She is going to be two tomorrow!

Abigail's second birthday is tomorrow! I can't believe it! That two years zipped by ;-) Chris and I reminisced last night about how early pretty much all night I had contractions and then very early in morning they got really close and we went in. It was a fun to experience that and everything was going almost too well, and then we found out the news about her heart. I found the email we originally sent out to notify our family and friends so I thought I would post it here....not to feel sad but to realize how blessed we are and what a long way she has come :-)


For those friends and family who have not heard yet... Abby is here a month early! She come out a beatiful baby girl weigning 6lbs. 5oz., and is 18 1/2 inches long. She arrived on 9/27 at 1:12 PM.> > The only down side is that she has some complications with her heart. She has several things that make her heart a bit different, the most concerning of which is a "coarctation of the aorta." (http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=11069) Long story really short, they have transferred her to Cardinal Glennon where they will perform heart surgery, probably sometime next week. The doctors tell us that the surgery itself is "not risky," but she will most likely be in the hospital for 2 to 3 weeks in total. They have some other things for which they are running tests, but we will know more in the coming weeks.> > Thankfully mama is doing well. The toughest thing for her is that she has only been able to hold Abby twice. I can't explain the pain of not even being able to try to comfort your child.> > If I had enough energy, I would attempt to express the gratitude I have for the love our our friends, our families, and our God. The last 45 hours have impacted me in many ways, not the least of which is a new awareness of the power of love and prayer.> > I have posted some pics. More to come later.

The Office

I am so happy, The Office is back! We watched the hour long episode last night and it was just as funny as when the show started. Plus, Chris and I can relate to the office romance (Pam and Jim, not Angela and Dwight....lol). Funniest thing last night, Ryan's revenge list.

nachomama

For the record, my favorite food is nachos. Not the fake cheese ones you get at sporting events either. I am talking homemade loaded up with cheese, beans, guac, and anything else I can find. I would eat them everyday, and I sometimes do.

Do nothing day

Sometimes you gotta have a do nothing day. Either you take it to rejuvenate or your body and soul just rebel. Unfortunately I am of the latter breed today.

I am good at getting myself a little too busy. Not just physically but mentally also. Since I am not a list person, to my husband's dismay, all of those mental bubbles floating around can get overwhelming at times. Mental bubbles of need and want to do's get hard to prioritize and you sometimes end up being good at wasting time. Mind you this is very different from "doing nothing". "Doing nothing" days are guilt free :-)

It is nice to do nothing though, take some deep breathes, just "play" with the kids, and even look at the landscape of the neighborhood with a little more appreciation. And of course, no housework or running around (even to the grocery store!).

I think I need more do nothing days or I am getting on the "Simplicity" wagon again. I am glad I posted "Simplicity" in my kitchen!!!

Big Girl

We went to our follow up endocrinologist appt yesterday and the verdict is.................she grew! She is now 32" and in the 5th percentile on the regular growth chart so we don't have to do growth hormones just yet! I am so relieved. Thank you tall Papa and thank you for all those that have been praying for our little girl.

One of those moments

I love those moments that remind you "Life is really good" and I have nothing to complain, worry, or stress about. Sometime I get mad at myself for forgetting that in general but fortunately I have a lot of those moments to remind me.

Anyway, lately Abby has this thing where she will lean on you, give you a kiss, and say "I Wuv You". It practically makes your heart melt. She was doing it to me last night but I just heard her say it to her Papa. He took the day off to take her to her Little Gym class and see her in action.

Sandpaper People

Still reading "30 Days to Live" and it is continuing to make me think...........I read last night about "Sandpaper people". In other words, we all have those people in life that rub us the wrong way and we have to work at loving. It states that God puts these people in our life for a reason, to help us become sharper and better. I got it but then here is the real lightbulb moment...we ARE "Sandpaper People" to others in life. No matter how hard we try not to there are people in life that we rub the wrong way and don't like us (sometimes even if they love us). Not that it gives me an excuse to be a jerk but reminds me of why I should be more tolerant and loving towards my "Sandpaper People".

I am glad I wrote this down. I need to remind myself of this one. ;-)

You know you are approaching your thirties when.....

You realize you must carry Rolaids, Claritin, and Ibuprofin in you purse at all times. Ugh.

Big Boy

Toby had his 3rd birthday yesterday. It seems like that 3 years zipped by. His excitement reminded me of being a kid and your Mom decorating the house, getting presents and cake and lots of love. We had a fun day. His main gift was a train ride on Saturday but we took him to the toy store yesterday to get a real baseball glove. We also made him a special meal and had a "baseball" cake. I think the kids birthdays are two of my favorite days of the year.

P.S. He also LOVES the roaring, walking dinosaur that Aunt Manda got him but that his sister is deathly afraid of.

Our daughter the monkey

A New Day

Today was Toby's first day of school (Children's Day Out). He loved it and.........he had NO ACCIDENTS! The teacher said he told her he had to potty a few times and he went, yay!!!! He ate all his lunch and he made us an art project to be displayed prominently on the fridge. He told me it was the fireworks at the Cardinal game. I did not cry but did feel the emotions rising as we left the parking lot.

After we dropped Toby off, Abby and I went to the Little Gym. She had a blast. She explored everything and was good at somersaults, running across the balance beam, and hanging from the low bar like a monkey. She really was excited and had fun. I will try to get pics next time.

It was weird having just one kid at home but it was good. Abby and I read books and she played with her baby doll without big brother dominating play time or stealing stuff from her.

It is a new day in this household!

my music

I love music. I feel it is so soothing to my soul. Chris and I both LOVE music so much that when we first started dating we weren't sure how our tastes would work together. I was a rock queen and he was country cowboy but we have learned to broaden our horizens and appreciate even more music.

He recently purchased Michal Macdonald's greatest hits and although I joked that he was "predictable" it is really very good! In fact it has been soothing my soul as I have been missing him this weekend. Especially this track, love it!

you know you're in trouble when.......

you have already removed the diaper and you realize you have only one wipe left for what is at least a three wipe job.

Welcome to school

We went to Toby's "Welcome to School" day yesterday. His children's day out program starts next Thursday. He was so excited. We have been talking about it for a while and this week Chris took him to get new kicks and a lunchbox so he knew it was getting close. We met his teacher and got his book bag and milk card. We just visited (his class will usually be 4 hours once a week) and when we left he balled all the way to the grocery store. I am excited for him too.

I think (hope) it is safe to say he is officially potty trained! I am glad, I wanted him to be confident going in, even though this is only CDO. We have had very few accidents in the last week and he is initiating the bathroom breaks on his own. He even has woken up dry from nap more often than not.

He is growing up!

Eighties

Ahhh nap time, what would I do without it. A little quiet and an opportunity to be productive.....or not.

The ads in the paper today really emphasized that the eighties are back! Skinny jeans, chunky jewelry, loud stripes, bold colors. I don't think I am going to be IN this time around. Oh well. I do love eighties music though. This reminded me though of a funny Scrubs skit I saw once so I got it off of YouTube. Zach Braff is a crack-up.

Case of the Mundays

Did you see that movie Office Space and remember that line "Do you have a case of the Mondays?". Funny movie, a little too vulgar though. Sometimes I feel like I have the Mundays disease. I feel like a slug and that my house is a disaster.

I remember even when I worked loathing Mondays. I make a point to try not to leave the house on Mondays and be relaxed but somewhat productive (start laundry, etc). I actually like Mondays now better. What will I do when I have to work again???

Today I started running around trying to pick up and organize (to get out of the Mundays I guess). I wonder if my mother-n-law is right, that you are happier when you are more organized.

Deep thoughts today :-)

BLT's for dinner and then Girls Night Out...woohoo!!!

Water Gun Fun

I am reading two books now that are helping me to re-evaluate and learn to live more "in the moment". They are One Month to Live: 30 Days to a No Regrets Life and The Mommy Diaries (our MOPS theme book this year). Great books, I would recommend even after only reading a few chapters.

I appreciate the children for so many reasons but reading these books I am learning a new thing to appreciate is that they present me daily with opportunities to live in the moment with no regrets.....and to have fun.

Case in point: A couple of weeks ago we took the kids to ride go-karts and bumper boats on a weeknight. We had some free passes and needed to get out of our routine for one night. Chris took Toby on the go karts and suggested I take him on the bumper boats. Little did I know there are water guns built into these bumper boats. In addition, 3-4 young boys also were riding the bumper boats at that time.

So they saw me and Toby and pretty much left us alone at first but Tobe saw them squirting and starting to try to squirt too. So, I decided to get in on the fun and once these kids realized I was game they were nailing us with the water guns and I was getting them GOOD too. I laughed HARD and we all had a good time. I left kind of soaked but it was so worth it and I am going to try to remember to follow the kids lead once in while.

Tap Class

Ok, so I signed up for an intermediate tap class through Meremac just for fun and a mid-week mommy break. I walk in tonight and most of the ladies were past retirement age. So even though I haven't tapped in years I am thinking "I got this in the bag". The instructor was definitely of a classic style. She actually had a record player and records!

Well I enjoyed the class but let's just say that God was telling me to stay humble and don't judge.... or else I will put you where you belong. In addition to NOT having it "in the bag" I couldn't beat some of those ladies (teacher included) in a legs contest even being 25 years younger.

They were funny though and they helped me have a good time and not take it too seriously. Plus it was good exercise.

Cute pics from the zoo

Btw, I did have fun watching the kids have fun but most of the time I was stressed, sigh.

Control Freak

So, show of hands...who thinks I am a conrol freak? I always thought of a control freak as someone very neat and organized but I am realizing that it can take different forms.

Yesterday, I took the kids to the zoo with another Mom. This Mom has older children and is a little older than I. I felt like I was yelling at Toby to come back practically all day and I think this Mom may have thought I was a little nutty. I was having panic attacks all day if the kids left my line of site for even a second. There are a lot of people at the zoo and it only takes a second for someone to snatch them up. In hindsight I should have just made both of them ride in the stroller for the majority of the day, however, they really did have a good time running with the other kids.

There lies the dilemma. I am stuggling to find the line of letting them have fun and me keeping them safe. I like to think I am a good parent and am just setting boundaries and structure for them. Although, I realized the more I yelled at Toby yesterday the less control I had of the situation. I really don't like yelling at them either, it makes me feel like a really lousy mother but sometimes it's like 2 year olds just don't hear you.

Needless to say, I am very glad today to be back at home with the kids in our environment and I am not taking anymore trips to the zoo without Chris or a kid leash, lol.

Thing 1 and Thing 2

I gave the kids a bath today, which they love, and noticed that thing 2 (baby sis) was mimicking thing 1 (big bro). They had little tea cups and were playing like they were pouring and drinking coffee. I was glad to see this and I have seen it vice-versa quite often too. I am excited about it because I think it means they LIKE each other. We still have plenty of biting, yelling, and stealing throughout the day but they are learning to play together and I do think they will be lifelong buds. It comforts me to know too that when they go to school they will be able to support one another.

It also comforts me in my decision to spend this time at home with them. First, I get to be there to observe the coffee party but also I think if they were in day care around other kids they wouldn't be learning to like each other as well.

So this is one large thing to appreciate in this season, as well as the homegrown tomatoes. My neighbor has brought me lots of homegrown tomatoes lately and boy are they good! We have had fresh peaches too and I am loving it. Although, I still like fall/winter better the produce in summertime is very nice. The fresh produce sort of makes up for the heat and those awful, viscous, dreaded mosquitoes!

Adventures in Mothering

Our MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group theme this year is Adventures in Mothering...Ephesians 3:18: “…how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.” When I first heard it I wasn't real moved but I thought I will go with it and make it work (from a leader perspective). I started reading the book and it is a collecion of short stories written by Mom's. It is good but still I thought....I am past the crazy stage of mothering. My kids are becoming more independent. Although, this week has definitely seemed like a rollercoaster, and I am realizing this theme is ME, not as a leader but as a mother.

Case in point: Started out today with the dog hiking his leg in the kitchen on the stove, floor, and on some recycled grocery bags. It was a lot. He must be losing his mind in his old age.....it did not seem an issue of control. Mess #1. We sat down to read books in the blue chair and I thought "It really is nice staying home with my sweet babies, the dog isn't going to ruin my day"......spoke too soon. Then Toby had two accidents in his pants this morning...he also must be losing his mind because he knows this is starting to put me over the edge. Mess #2 and #3. The man finally came to fix the dishwasher....YEAH! Put dishes in the dishwasher and got laundry started. Woohoo! Let kids watch Pooh this morning and started trying to fold laundry. They wandered into the bathroom and broke the pineapple soap dispenser on the sink. Abby was making a little gagging sound and I assume she ate some of the soap. Mess #4, and call to Poison Control, geesh. Then we ate lunch and went outside to play. Beautiful day!!! Toby wanted to get in the pool so I decided to be adventurous (purposefully) and we got suits on. We actually had fun.

Came back in to get naps ASAP (can't stand whining!). Before nap Toby pooped on the potty, YEAY! Suckers all around. Abby of course didn't eat her sucker instead sticking it to me, her, and all nearby surfaces. Mess #5. While putting Toby down I noticed I heard water running some where.......I know I turned off the hose. I went to investigate and found water all over the bathroom floor near the laundry room. Opened the commode basin to get sprayed in the face with the hose. Geesh, Mess #6. Not looking forward to hubby coming in from bad day at work and that is the first thing he gets to do. Ugh.

Some where in all of that I am realizing that the theme REALLY is fitting me. In all the craziness you sometimes lose track of your identity. I have heard this in the past before and thought "That's not me, my family is my identity" however there are still things I used to love like dance and listening to rock music that I need to touch base with once in a while. I need to touch base with things from my youth so that my children know to have fun with their youth and that I am not a crabby mean old mommy all the time. More than fun things though, I need to find the passions of my soul so that God will bless those and help me be a better Mom. I am not just a mess cleaner upper!

Now for ME time (in addition to writing this blog). Off to a work out and to listen to the Pixes "Where is My Mind?"......hehehe

Working

Working hard or hardly working...

Humble

Well we missed our Cardinals game today which is a bummer because our family really had fun there last time we went. Toby's favorite thing right now is Cardinals baseball but staying home this afternoon seemed the best thing to do after the morning we had.

Abigail had her check-up echocardiogram today and man did she fight! She was even sedated for part of it and still put up her dukes. I felt so out of control. I couldn't comfort, console, distract, or even hold her down (she is a strong little thing!). I felt so helpless and who knows what the nurses were thinking. I did pray for God to help us get through it though and the good news is in the end they got the pictures and Abigail is still doing well. Praise God. I am reminded again of how God controls things, not me.

I did feel comforted when Chris and Toby came in to be with us. No matter what the situation I feel 90% of the tension release if he (Chris) enters it. What a blessing to have such a loving, comforting, strengthing, supportive partner. Today it was just him validating what we were going through in there and that "Our daughter really is a sweetheart!"

More on God's is in control, I received an email this morning with the Steven Curtis Chapman interview about the loss of his daughter Maria. What a testimony on how even when we can't understand God's plan we have to keep faith: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ApIQXJqJmAs

poopoo!!!

We (Toby) are finally making progress on the potty training. For some reason I thought it would be easier even after all of the stories I had heard about boys being tougher. Well I can validate, unless you started potty training them at birth, boys ARE tough! He still doesn't initiate on his own and I have to ask 30 times an hour "Do you have to go potty?" but he is successful at peeing and pooping (twice yesterday!) on the potty. What a relief! We are still having accidents and it is tought not to get frustrated at him, especially during PMS, but he really is doing good. I am proud of my boy!!!! M&M's all around!

8/4/05

Well I just got in from getting the mail and cleaning dog poop off my shoes. Yuck! Sometimes I wish I could hose the whole house down with a pressure washer and organic cleaner.

I wonder if all dogs really do go to heaven? I hope not, or at least if they do maybe they don't poop, shed, lick, or jump on you in heaven. Ironically, I think the dog poop got on my shoes when I was picking up dog poop in the back yard (my least favorite task).

I am a little crabby today and I think it could be PMS. I yelled at the kids a couple of times and I hate when I do that. They get this frozen look on their face like "I think she may take my head off". I am talking screaming yelling not just a change in tone or volume. I always try to apologize to them and today I explained that yelling is not nice and Mommy shouldn't do it and we shouldn't do it to each other. I felt this was necessary as Toby (2) and Abby (1) have been doing some yelling at each other. Actually it's kind of funny to hear it coming out of their little bodies. In fact, they were going back and forth at the dinner table the other night. Toby spitting at her and her yelling at the top of her little baby lungs "NOOOOOO!". Toby ended up starting to laugh at her and we were giggling a little too but she was dead serious.

I prayed for God to help me get out of my funk today. It is a pretty good day besides the oven outside. I took the kids out for about 10 minutes, it was just too hot. Then I bribed them with juice to come back in. After that I decided to color with them instead of just watching them play because I was crabby (I like to color) and I colored a page that said "You are a very blessed woman". It was a little Christian book and it was the angel telling Mary about baby Jesus. So, God answered my prayer and I have been repeating that phrase all day "You are a very blessed woman". I am getting less crabby, despite the dog poop.

I wonder if woman are hungrier when they are PMSing or maybe I am just always hungry. I just had an eggroll with some homemade sauce. Eggrolls are just not as good out of the microwave but in this heat I could not turn the oven on for 1 eggroll. I still really liked the eggroll. I wanted sweet and sour sauce but we didn't have any so I used honey and vinegar. It doesn't taste the same but it was good. Then an organic chocolate chip cookie. I swear organic things somehow taste better. Funny thing though, I am still hungry!!!!